Saturday, June 09, 2007

Mammogram Pop Quiz

I had one of these the other day. Just like that. The cancer agency called and said "We (not sure who the royal we is in this case - because I am sure the queen doesn't care) want you to come in for some alternate views." Alternate to what? I think to myself. But keep quiet, because really, what good would my cheeky sense of humour be in the face of the unwaveringly unamused people that seem to find themselves employed at Cancer World.

So in I trot, just a few scant hours after the call (lucky me, they had an opening at 3). Accompanied by the fabulous Kimberly, who made me laugh right the way through.

Dr. Wilson (I should have known the royal we included a scots woman) had found a suspicious looking white patch on the results of my regular mammogram, and wanted to double check. After a ludacrus number of "alternate views", that, by the way, required a few yoga poses to accomplish, but were still effective at reaching every part of my breast even so (done by a woman called Cathy, who was so exceptionally nice and gentle - bless her heart, and her boobs, when it comes her turn with the machine). With breaks, where I should have been icing my breasts, but who has ice handy? I was told with a sort of hesitancy that less than inspires my confidence that it must have been the scar tissue folded over itself. I can go home now.

I swear they do this sort of thing just to keep me on my toes.


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